Proofreading Humor
A Little Humor for the Proofreader
Interviewer (RSF): Hello! Welcome to “I Bet You Didn’t Know This.” I’m your host Rosemary Serluca-Foster. So many of us take for granted our punctuation, grammar, spelling and fact-checking, relying more and more on our computers to do the work for us. But today’s guest has a different viewpoint. She thinks we’re all lazy, don’t use our own eyes and brains enough, and could definitely benefit from a crash course in proofreading. We are so fortunate to have with us today the award-winning proofreader and president of the national, top grossing, proofreaders’ agency Hamilton and Posner. Please welcome Carol Ann Hamilton.
(Audience Applause.)
RSF: Hi Carol Ann. Thanks so much for joining us on “I Bet You Didn’t Know This.”
CAH: Thanks for having me. By the way, that’s Carol Ann with a hyphen. I can see on the monitor that the hyphen is missing between Carol and Ann.
RSF: Proofreading right now in the present moment!
CAH: Always. You can’t believe the amount of errors I catch.
RSF: I guess you just can’t help yourself.
CAH: That’s right. Like a psychotherapist who can’t help but analyze everyone, including her own family, I can’t help myself from constantly proofreading. My husband hates it.
RSF: I bet. Well, we are so thrilled to have you on our show today.
CAH: I am thrilled too, and excited to finally set things straight about the enormous importance of proofreading. To all of you out there who are using your computers as the sole source to fulfill your proofreading needs, I can’t say it enough, there is absolutely no substitute for your own eyes and your own brain.
RSF: Excellent point. Tell us, Carol with a hyphen Ann, who exactly is a proofreader, and what are his or hers main responsibilities.
CAH: A proofreader my friend, may I call you my friend, it feels like we could be friends, don’t you agree?
RSF: Absolutely.
CAH: The word proofreader actually describes the job: a person who reads the proof.
RSF: I never thought of it that way.
CAH: But the job itself is much larger than just reading a proof. A proofreader is quite literally the last person in the line, after the author, copyeditor, and even publisher, to check the final document before it goes off to press or distribution. Everyone is relying on the proofreader to turn out an absolutely perfect product.
RSF: So much pressure!
CAH: It can be. But not if you know what you’re doing.
Whereas, a copyeditor reviews a preliminary draft and will not focus on the whole look of the manuscript, a proofreader will be looking at the piece in its entirety, including the layout for overall consistency, fact checking, spelling and grammar. So it’s looking in very specifically, as well as, standing back and taking in the whole big picture.
RSF: That’s a lot to cover.
CAH: That’s why it’s a big job and not everyone can do it well. Let me tell you, the difference between an excellent proofreader, and a mediocre one is that an excellent one will ALWAYS use her style guide, style sheet which she may have received from the copyeditor to check against, and utilizing her own research. She won’t rely on the fancy shmacny track changes feature found in MS word.
RSF: Sounds like you’re not a big fan of that computer tool.
CAH: I am a bit old school, but I do like the tool. In fact, it can be very fun to use and some of my younger proofreaders really enjoy it. But even when you’re using that computer tool, you still need your style guide and style sheet, and you must always show the changes you’ve made, which the track changes feature does allow. But it’s not the most reliable source. That’s why, I repeat again, there is no substitute for a trained eye and sharp brain when it comes to proofreading. And you still need to know your proofreaders’ marks and how to apply them.
RSF: I love those marks!
CAH: It’s our own special language.
RSF: How many times do you read a text before you feel complete?
CAH: I read it as many times as it takes, forwards, backwards, and sideways. Ten times if necessary. Even someone with a trained eye like mine can miss something. And so much is riding on my ability to catch the errors. It’s essential to read it over and over, especially out loud.
RSF: Out loud?
CAH: Mm-hm. Reading the text aloud helps me really hear if there are errors. The eye may pass right over a mistake when you’re reading silently to yourself, but when you read something out loud, you have to pronounce the words, and if there is an error, you will of course say it wrong, which makes it much easier to flag.
RSF: So you walk around your house reading the document out loud?
CAH: That’s right.
RSF: Does your family think you’re crazy?
CAH: They are so used to it by now they don’t even hear me. Except for my husband who uses those foam earplugs.
RSF: Can you give us a run-down of specific things a proofreader has to look for?
CAH: I thought you’d never ask.
RSF: OK audience. I bet you didn’t know this, so listen up.
CAH: Number one. Great proofreaders read and proof the whole text looking for inconsistencies. For example, if the author is spelling Carol-Ann with a hyphen throughout the text, and then all of a sudden on page 103 the name appears without a hyphen, you must flag that because the spelling has to be consistent throughout the manuscript.
RSF: Consistency. Got it.
CAH: Number two. If there are any graphics with captions that go with them, which you tend to find in non-fiction books, you must absolutely make sure that the art is in the right place, and that the right words correspond to it. We had an absolute tragedy occur once when a disgruntled proofreader willfully flopped captions and graphics. Catastrophe!
RSF: Does that happen a lot? I mean do proofreaders get so angry that they go postal on people?
CAH: They wouldn’t go that far, I hope. And no, it doesn’t happen a lot. Especially with anyone on my team. But every so often, you get someone who wants to play a little high jinks, or get back at his or her boss. Doing something like that is proofreader suicide because no one will ever want to work with you again.
RSF: I should say not. OK. Correct graphics with correct captions. Got it.
CAH: Good. You catch on quick. OK, number three. As a proofreader, you must make sure the fonts, headlines, captions are all consistent. It can be very time consuming, but you must remain patient and really check. There is nothing that annoys me more than when I’m reading something in
Times Roman and then all of a sudden Verdana just pops up in a lone word.
RSF: Yes, very annoying. Check for consistent fonts, headlines, captions. Got it.
CAH: Number four. Consistent spacing. Absolutely make sure that the spacing between headlines and paragraphs, and the gutter between two columns of text are all consistently the same, and there are proper line breaks.
RSF: Consistency seems to be coming up a lot. Would you say it’s the most important thing a proofreader has to think about?
CAH: My friend, it’s all important. Number five. One of the easiest things to screw up is looking for trapped white space especially within justified text.
RSF: What is trapped white space? Sounds cosmic.
CAH: There is nothing cosmic about it. Any white space that is not margins, gutters, or breaks between lines or paragraphs is considered trapped white space. It shouldn’t be there, and you must get it out!
RSF: Trapped white space is an outlaw.
CAH: You’re getting the hang of it. And let’s not forget to add once again that a proofreader needs to check for spelling, grammar, and factual errors, and really use her style guide and style sheet.
RSF: Whew! I had no idea so much was involved. Thanks so much for tuning us in. Well, we’ve run out of time. I want to thank our wonderful guest, Carol-Ann Hamilton, president of Hamilton and Frazer, for taking us into the underbelly of proofreading.
(Audience Applause.)
CAH: It was my pleasure. And to all you proofreaders out there, please remember just how important your job is. You are absolutely invaluable!
RSF: Join us next week on “I Bet You Didn’t Know This!” with guest
Michael Tarbolt, who will take us into the mysterious world of spelunking.
I’m Rosemary Serluca-Foster. Good night.